Let's Dissolve the NCAA!

Get it? It's dissolving.

From the Johnny Manziel signing scandal to the Northwestern Football Unionization, there is one issue that is pretty resounding through college sports: Should we pay these kids?

The NCAA says resoundingly No. Because they are student athletes and it would ruin integrity and blah di blah blah blah.

I happen to agree that athletes should not be paid by the Colleges and Universities which they attend. Not because they don't deserve it, but because there is no logistic way to make it work (please comment below with all your logistic ways to make it work).

Do you pay the football team more than the basketball team? Swim Team? Do you pay the starting quarterback more than the third string offensive lineman? What happens if the quarterback gets injured? Does his money get allocated to the backup? And once you do pay athletes, how much is enough? How much is enough that they won't feel the need to take more money if they can get it? (spoiler: it will never be enough)

2014 Sixers: I Sure Hope This Works

Chart does not actually depict Sixers trends...just their lack of awesomeness.

I usually try not to do posts just about the home team, but I think the home team is enough of a national story laughing stock that a post is warranted.

The Tankdelphia Seventy Tankers are well on their way to a top draft pick after the end of this horrifically bad season. The end of a season that cannot get here any faster. The ends justify the means though, right? If the Sixers win a Championship in the next 5 3 years, no one will care that they tore the team down to the rafters to get there. They'll talk about it, because haters always gonna hate! But what will we care? Sixers will be champs again after all these years.

Except, I don't know if I'm cool with the tanking. It's lame...sooooper lame! Watching games is painful. I subscribe to a service that texts me reminders about Sixers games and final scores. I'm wondering how many variations of losing they have on tap. Sixers "slide". Sixers "fall". [Opponent] "top" Sixers. Sixers "come up short"..which is really the best one of all. They came up short? Like a cockroach comes up short to Shaq? Yeah I guess short covers it. Frankly, I'm surprised they are still sending me texts at all. If I see this one day I wouldn't be the least bit surprised.

The Bracket Battle is B-B-BACK!!!

It is the moment you've all been waiting for!

No, not the newest season of House of Cards...
No, not the next flavor of Lay's potato chips...
No, not the 2014 football season...


It's the NCAA TOURNAMENT!

Which is really cool and all. Basketball and colleges and heated competition. But what's REALLY cool about it is the return of the Sports Pro and the Average Bro Bracket Battle! (Password: battle)

BUT WAIT!

The 4th annual version of our world famous Battle comes with a new twist. The Big Dance is coming up, so who are you bringing with you?

Do you know any Famous Celebrities? D-List Celebrities? Sports Personalities? Some guy that more than 5 people have heard of? Get them to compete in our battle and you could win an extra prize!

Sh*t People Only Say During The Olympics

The best of all the stuff you heard all Olympics long...and won't hear again for another 4 years.

Sports Pro's Celebrity All Star Team

Really NBA? These are celebrities? Couple of WNBA ladies and the Secretary of Education?! Let me educate you Mr. Secretary: You aren't a celebrity!

Here is the perfect Celebrity All-Star team. Funny, Smart, and Tough. This team has the chemistry to compete with the greats. The late 50s early 60s Celtics. The Lakers of the 80’s. The soon to be Sixers of the future. So, without further ado, here they are:

PG- Ben Stein 

 A solid point guard needs two things, brains and vision. He needs to be able to see the floor, find the open teammate, and avoid any dumb decisions. He was Ferris Bueller’s Ecom teacher, so you know he’s got the smarts. And he starred in countless Visine commercials, so you know he’s got the vision. He’s old, sure, but he’s got the makings of a solid floor general.